all twerk no play

andrewjacksonjerkwad:

fucknolesmis:

the only kawaii emoticon you will ever need is this 

(◕)

it’s mike wazowski. 

image

go hard or go home motherfucker

this took 16 hours, suck my dick

friend: i watched an episode of the thing you like
me: oh god
me: i am about to tell you literally everything about the thing
someoneatethis:

It’s not like anything matters anyway. Our lives are nothing. This world is nothing. Chili Spaghetti is nothing. Eat it… don’t eat it… the result is the same: you are insignificant.

someoneatethis:

It’s not like anything matters anyway. Our lives are nothing. This world is nothing. Chili Spaghetti is nothing. Eat it… don’t eat it… the result is the same: you are insignificant.

oxbutt:

playing truth or dare
more like
image

or

image

1nd2rd3st:

crusherccme:

found this gem in the 1996 Cornell Women’s Handbook. it’s what to say when a guy tries to get out of using a condom

“Yes, but you might catch something from me” that’ll get him to use a condom haha

1nd2rd3st:

crusherccme:

found this gem in the 1996 Cornell Women’s Handbook. it’s what to say when a guy tries to get out of using a condom

“Yes, but you might catch something from me” that’ll get him to use a condom haha

ocebutt:

dooptown:

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again

YOU DO NOT NEED TO BRING YOUR GUN TO THE GROCERY STORE

how does america even function like it sounds like a video game or something. grand theft freedom.